(originally aired September 11, 1994)
Here’s another episode with a fairly simple, standard story, but plays out in a very natural way. With not many friends and a hectic home life, all Lisa really has is her reputation at school for being the overachieving brain, a title she holds quite dear to her. Enter Alison Taylor, a girl one year younger than Lisa, but is smarter, sharper and a better saxophone player. Despite her level of intelligence and compassion, I like how Lisa has her own foibles; she and Allison could have formed a great friendship right away, but instead she becomes instantly threatened by this girl who has horned in on her territory, seemingly taking away everything that made her feel special. She develops a quiet loathing of this innocent girl; upon witnessing Allison get harassed by some bullying bitches, Lisa laments, “That used to be me in that mud puddle.”
To pad out our Lisa story is some crazy Homer antics, of course, where he ransacks the goods of a jackknifed sugar truck, hoping to sell it off for a profit. This is Homer at his most insane, which fluctuates from hilarious to reminiscent of Jerkass Retarded Homer of later years. His logic regarding his right to take the sugar (“Read your town charter, boy. ‘If foodstuff should touch the ground, said foodstuff shall be turned over to the village idiot.’ Since I don’t see him around…start shoveling!”) and his bulletproof marketing strategy (labeling the nails and broken glass within the product as “prizes”) is classic Homer thinking. But on the whole the scheme just feels so poorly thought out, even for Homer. When Marge urges him to stop, we get another rambling monologue similar to his movie quoting in “Successful Marriage,” only saved in that this one’s a bit funnier and spectacular animation by David Silverman. Maybe it would make more sense if more time were spent on it… or maybe not. Whatever.
Bart acts at the devil on Lisa’s shoulder to use underhanded tactics to detriment Allison, until she eventually breaks and accepts his brother’s help. The ending with the diorama displays, and Lisa living out her own version of The Telltale Heart is very satisfying, and a suitable conclusion to the story. In the end, Lisa and Allison are friends, but of course since the latter is voiced by guest star Winona Ryder, we’d never hear from her again. This episode is also greatly responsible for popularizing Ralph, as we get two landmark lines from him in the show: “I bent my Wookie” and “My cat’s breath smells like cat food.” The ending of Lisa and Allison walking arms locked with Ralph is really sweet.
Tidbits and Quotes
– The opening sets up how Lisa’s life is her intelligence and her talent, showing the rest of the family a bit perturbed at her playing her sax in the house. Bart ends up botching his prank call to Skinner (“Well, as a matter of fact, my refrigerator wasn’t running. You’ve spared me quite a bit of spoilage: thank you, anonymous young man,”) and Homer destroys Marge’s camera hammering it with a drill (“I’m going to need a bigger drill.”) The best bit is Marge’s daydreams of her ridiculous romance novel, of her in the strong arms of a tanned, muscular fellow of questionable sexuality (Marge asks if the earring in his right ear means he’s a pirate. The man noncommittally responds, “Kinda.”) She’s jolted back to reality by her daughter’s music, giving a great Freudian slip (“Lisa, stop blowing my sex. I mean, stop blowing your sax, your sax!”) I also like the somewhat sad look into her domestic life, in that she admits to sacrificing a perfectly good camera for Homer to destroy in order to get some quiet time.
– Nice brief appearance by Hans Moleman, driver of the sugar truck, who Homer offers to guard the shipment while he finds a pay phone (“If only this sugar were as sweet as you, sir.”) Once he’s gone, Homer wastes no time to start shoveling (“We’ve hit the jackpot here! White gold, Texas tea … sweetener!”)
– I love Lisa confronting her mother about why she was never moved up a grade, insinuating that she could have been a bit “nicer” to Principal Skinner. The read and timing of Marge’s response is fabulous: “Lisa! …I am nice.” There’s so many possible reads for this… maybe it’s just my filthy filthy mind, but I think “nicer” implies “favors.” As said from an eight-year-old girl. Makes perfect sense. Not really. Whatever, the scene’s still hilarious.
– The first act break is hysterical, with the fake-out, and Largo’s self-awareness (“Alison got first chair, and believe me, this is not a dream!”)
– Great bit with Bart using a tape recorder to make note of future pranks, then his evil cackle. Then stop. Then record, and finishes off the cackle. I also forgot this episode had the FBI chasing Milhouse, which is one of the best things of the entire series. Milhouse’s “Oh no, not again!” implying this has happened to him multiple times, and then the call-back of him in The Fugitive jumping off the waterfall (“Aaaaaaaaah!! …my glasses!”)
– Lisa’s daydream assuring there’s no shame in being second is great, with her in a band with other famous second bananas, who proceed to boo them immediately. Lisa awakes stating the obvious: “Why would they come to our concert just the boo us?”
– I love the extremely patronizing nature of Allison’s father, when Lisa fails to play along with their complicated anagram game, he dumbs it down a shade and gives her a ball to bounce.
– Love how Homer’s paranoia of sugar thieves ends up being valid when he catches a right British fellow stealing some for his tea (“I nicked it when you let your guard down for that split second, and I’d do it again.”) Also great is his spit take when the pile melts in the rain.
– The kids’ dioramas are great: Nelson’s literal take on The Grapes of Wrath (“Yes, very good wrath,”) Uter’s uter shame of his devouring of his rendition of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (“I begged you to look at mine first… I begged you!”) And of course there’s Ralph’s box full of unopened Star Wars action figures (“What’s a diorama?”) Skinner geeks out, and announces him the winner.
– I like how the end really ramps things up to a ridiculous level. It’s pretty clear Allison didn’t make the fake diorama and seems very distraught and shocked at it, but Skinner doesn’t hold back in sternly scolding her about it. Then when the real diorama is revealed, Skinner is completely unmoved. Then we think Lisa may win, but he’s equally as unmoved. Both of their displays are incredibly detailed and proficient for frigging second graders, and he gives them such cold dismissals. For some reason I find Asshole Skinner to be very amusing.