425. Dangerous Curves

Dangerous Curves(originally aired November 9, 2008)
Did Homer and Marge do anything else in their past other than fight, break up and get back together? The writers certainly can’t think of another thing, so here’s another fucking flashback show. This one actually jumps between two periods, twenty years prior, and five years prior to present day, about Homer and Marge’s simultaneous almost affairs. This is after “I Married Marge” and “Lisa’s First Word,” by the way, and all those wonderful, beautiful moments where we saw just how much these two love each other and what Homer is willing to do for his wife and his family. Here, they squabble and bitch about stupid shit, because their relationship is always on the rocks in every time period, apparently (“Homer Simpson, I wish I’d never met you!”) First we see young Homer and Marge hitch a ride with recent newlyweds… Ned and Maude Flanders. Goddammit, more of the “everybody knew everybody” shit again. Worse yet, of course, this is more psycho religious Ned, forcing Homer and Marge to sleep in separate rooms and having Maude wait up in a tree with a Super Soaker aimed at Homer’s penis if he tries any funny stuff the morning after. No, really, that happened.

The most focus is on five years ago when Homer and Marge both almost had one-night stands with two people they met at a party, two people whose names I don’t remember and have no real character traits to speak of. The guy is another Hank Azaria-voiced swarthy fellow, and the girl is… another nondescript Tress MacNeille voice. I’ll once again reiterate this is after Bart and Lisa were born, so Homer and Marge’s relationship should be pretty strong and meaningful at this point. But instead, they have a petty skirmish… something about Homer being reckless and irresponsible, and him thinking Marge is no fun. Okay… whatever. The two characters end up together at the end, and they show up at the cabin that the present day Simpsons are visiting, and the truth is revealed. Homer and Marge have another falling out, and get back together by the end, of course. I think this may be the worst flashback show ever… yes, even worse than “That ’90s Show.” That and “The Way We Weren’t” were terrible, but at least they existed in Homer and Marge’s pre-marital days. Here, the events of the classic flashback shows already happened, and despite all that, we see Homer and Marge are still as flimsy a couple as ever, negating everything those other episodes stood for.

Tidbits and Quotes
– Nice small joke at the beginning where Lisa and Maggie are asleep in the backseat leaning against each other, and Bart toys with their heads, seeing that their spiky hair interlocks like cogs.
– Holy shit… I fucking hate the Flanders stuff. Homer’s instant irrational hatred of Ned in “Lisa’s First Word” is a lot funnier than here where we see young Homer is taken with the guy, at least until he splits them up (“I never thought I’d say this, but… stupid Flanders.”) See, it’s funny because he hates Ned in modern day! Idn’t that great! Also, Ned is a sick, sick fuck, putting a bear trap outside Homer’s door (“What better way to celebrate our wedding night than by keeping an unmarried couple apart?”) and getting aroused by Maude buttoning up her dead grandmother’s pajamas.
– Bart plays a video game Cereal Killer, where he guns down famous cereal mascots, all voiced by Maurice LaMarche. I found it funny since LaMarche actually is the voice of Toucan Sam, and here he does his death cries as he’s shot down.
– They try to play Homer and Marge extremely naive, in how they stumble into almost fucking these other people… but I don’t get it. These two are grown adults who should be able to pick up on obvious cues (“You are adorable! Are you alone?” “No, I’m talking to you at this great party!”) Marge doesn’t speak up for herself, because she’s a namby pamby pushover, and Homer they just have get drunk. That almost feels worse to me… this whole episode feels worse, to be fair.
– I don’t see exactly what bullshit lies Homer and Marge concocted for each other on where the other had been all day, why they both ended up at that cabin, where Marge got that fancy dress, or where the girl’s car or the guy’s giant plane came from.
– The only good thing in the show comes from li’l Bart and Lisa; Grampa arrives at the cabin with the two and passes out on the bed. Bart cheers that now they can stay awake forever, the two jump for joy, then immediately pass out. So freaking adorable.
– The peddle car bit with Bart and Lisa is cute at first, but goes on for twice as long as it needs to.
– Weird that Marge, and seemingly Homer, would laud the cabin memory as one of the most beautiful moments of their marriage considering the secretive circumstances; you’d think each of them would be quick to brush those memories off and not mention them, let alone go on a family visit to the cabin where they almost fucked other people.

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15 responses to “425. Dangerous Curves

  1. Yeah, when this first aired, I shut this one off at the first commercial break. Much later, I caught the episode in reruns and found I didn’t miss much.

    Oh, happy new year. 🙂

  2. Great review Mike, this is another “meh” episode and oh yeah, Happy New Year and 2013 🙂

  3. I see you’re just pushing through now as you didn’t reach your new years end target but who could blame you really ZS is one unbearable thing…

  4. This is a terrible episode and it just insults everything the great flashback shows from the 90s. However, I still think the one where Marge and Homer were kids and he had the eye patch is still the worst of them all.

  5. – Holy shit… I fucking hate the Flanders stuff. Homer’s instant irrational hatred of Ned in “Lisa’s First Word” is a lot funnier than here where we see young Homer is taken with the guy, at least until he splits them up (“I never thought I’d say this, but… stupid Flanders.”) See, it’s funny because he hates Ned in modern day! Idn’t that great! Also, Ned is a sick, sick fuck, putting a bear trap outside Homer’s door (“What better way to celebrate our wedding night than by keeping an unmarried couple apart?”) and getting aroused by Maude buttoning up her dead grandmother’s pajamas.

    Well there goes any hope of psycho Ned only existed due to the loss of his wife -.- and if they so happened to meet 20 years ago why didn’t they recognise each other when they in Lisa’s First Word? your move “writers”

    – Weird that Marge, and seemingly Homer, would laud the cabin memory as one of the most beautiful moments of their marriage considering the secretive circumstances; you’d think each of them would be quick to brush those memories off and not mention them, let alone go on a family visit to the cabin where they almost fucked other people.

    ZS logic whatever just wait until you get to Wedding For Disaster… oh boy :/

  6. http://krikensworld.blogspot.co.uk/2011/02/episode-5-dangerous-curves.html <— they also summed up this episode well and from that review they sum up that woman epically "We then continue with the party as Homer bumps into a girl (Who I'm going to call dumb bitch) who quite possibly sets the record for character that pisses me off the fastest (Seriously she steals a drink from Homer after he says both drinks are for him, assumes he's trying to get her drunk after SHE STOLE THAT DRINK! Then she continues to hit on him after clearly him having no interest. Get me my gun)."

  7. And here’s another one I have no memory of. I know I was watching Season 20 when it weas out, but so far there’s been two episodes that I have no memory of.

  8. “Also, Ned is a sick, sick fuck” — again, another laugh-out-loud moment from your review. That’s great. I’d totally forgotten about the dead grandma pajamas part.

  9. This is the one where Homer accidentally pulled out Bart’s ear bones in the opening scene.

  10. To be quite honest, NOTHING is worst than That 90’s Show. At least a few portions of this episode actually happened (more or less, consider how Homer and Marge looked nothing like they did in They Way We Was when they first met (and knew each other’s identities) (and that’s not getting into Ned Flanders’ actual age, or even Maude’s for that matter)). Other than that, this is just another crappy episode. The only real confusion is the Flanders continuity.

    • Hang on didn’t Homer and Marge know each other for 16 years (according to “The Way We Was”) so that 20 years earlier is incorrect.

  11. Happy new year, Mike.
    This episode has that gross scene with the chewing gum and Bart’s ear bones….Did not need to see that.

  12. 1 last thing what’s the ending scene meant to be a reference to and is it meant to be a mirror effect or what because in some instances it looks like it then in others it’s not I’m so confused? :/

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